The Dragon Lady goes to Idaho

Today feels like the first day of this new phase in my life even though I haven’t really left yet. That’s next week. Today I said goodbye and closed a chapter in my life. I took Pat’s ashes with me today to Morro Bay and picked a quiet spot where we used to sit and listen to the waves and scattered his ashes. As I watched his ashes mix into the ocean waves with each ebb and flow of the water I thanked mother earth for welcoming him back to her arms. I was expecting to feel fear or loss at the scattering, the “oh no what have I done?” Feeling that other people have talked about with the sudden loss of the tangible part of their loved one that remained. I didn’t have that. I was oddly happy, relieved? It felt right, it felt like a thank you, in a way. While he will always be part of me, it felt good to let him be free again. So, in a very real way, this is day 1. Let’s see where this new path leads. Knowing me it will be chaotic, funny at times, heartbreaking at others, but it will always be interesting…..